Do affirmations really help? Or are they just a waste of time?
I get it, I really do. Repeating things to yourself can feel...ridiculous.
Looking in the mirror and saying something you don't fully believe? Not appealing to me.
The first time my counselor brought up affirmations, I was skeptical.
Hello, my brain already knows the truth. How will repeating something change anything?
For me, it helped.
Not in a Disneyland magic, my husband is no longer dead, type of way.
The hard feelings were still there, and honestly they still are.
Feelings exist for a reason. They tell us - "Hey! Something is going on here!"
For me, affirmations became a way to pause.
To take a breath when things felt overwhelming
And to keep myself spiraling into reactivity.
If they aren't for you, that's ok.
But if you are interested in trying something to see if it clicks, the links below are a few examples for the different kinds of days you might be having.
Anger can be one of the most uncomfortable parts of grief. It can feel sharp, unexpected and sometimes even directed at the people or things you don't want it to be.
But anger isn't a flaw. It's a response. It often shows up when something feels unfair, out of control or deeply painful.
Affirmations help create a pause between what you feel and how you react. Not to suppress the anger, but to keep it from taking over everything.
Anxiety can feel loud, fast and overwhelming. Your mind races, your body reacts and it can feel like you're constantly trying to catch up to your own thoughts.
Nothing is actually "wrong" with you in those moments, your brain is trying to protect you. Even if your brain is overdoing it.
Affirmations on these days aren't there to shut anxiety off completely. They're there to slow the spiral. They give your mind something steady to come back to when everything feels scattered.
Some days aren't sad. They aren't anxious. They are just - HEAVY.
You're tired, unmotivated and everything feels like more than it should.
That doesn't mean you are failing. It means your body and mind are asking for a slower pace.
Affirmations on these days aren't about hyping yourself up or pretending you feel great. They are about giving yourself permission to exist without pressure. They help interrupt the voice that says you should be more.
I don't have to tell you that sadness in grief runs deep. It shows up in waves, in quiet moments and sometimes out of nowhere.
Sadness can make you feel stuck, heavy, or like you're moving through life differently than everyone else. Even other people experiencing grief.
Affirmations during sadness aren't about fixing it or making it go away. They're about making space for it without feeling like you're doing something wrong. They help you stay with your feelings without getting lost in them.
These days can feel the most confusing.
You might notice a moment of peace, a small bit of joy, or just a lighter feeling. Instead of relief you start feeling weird about it.
You ask yourself, "Should I feel this way? What does this mean? Am I moving on too much?
Affirmations on these days are incredibly important. They help you understand that feeling ok is not a betrayal. It doesn't erase your love. It doesn't mean you've forgotten.
It means you are human, and you are still here.